How to get up early

Before you ask yourself how, you gotta ask yourself why.

For me, it’s usually to go see birds. And to get some time alone in a quiet house before the kids get up.

So here’s the advice I give myself.

Go to bed earlier

Maybe tomorrow night, don’t stay up until 11 pm watching Poker Face?

The two-season Peacock series stars Natasha Lyonne as Charlie Cale, a down-on-her-luck vagrant with the uncanny superpower of knowing when anyone is telling a lie.

It’s not a show that will soothe you to sleep—Natasha Lyonne is a firecracker, and murder follows her around the country!

So tonight, try reading in bed instead and turning off the lights by 10 pm. 

Set an alarm

I know the advice is to get a real alarm clock so you don’t have to sleep with your phone, but let’s not go overboard on self-improvement.

Set the alarm on your phone for earlier than you’d like: 5:30 am?

But don’t lie to yourself

You’re not getting up at 5:30 am and you know it. Delete that alarm and set another one for 6 am, when you are committed to getting out of bed.

Because, once again, tonight you stayed up too late watching Poker Face.

And much like Charlie Cale, as played by Natasha Lyonne, you possess the innate ability of knowing when to call bullshit—on yourself.

And don’t hit snooze

The snooze button is a lie.

It seduces you with the promise of more sleep, but all you really get is a lousy five minutes and lingering a sense of failure and regret.

And what does Charlie Cale do with lies?

That’s right, she calls BULLSHIT!

So call bullshit on the snooze button and get yourself out of bed.

Get out immediately

Just get up out of bed, and get out of there. Quietly. Don’t wake anyone!

You don’t want anything to come between you and your YOU TIME.

Seize the morning

Okay, okay, you’re up. Now what?

1. Coffee
2. Bathroom
3. Make the morning YOURS.
   • A. Me, I might spend a little time writing down any Poker Face-induced dreams I can remember, reading a book, and drinking more coffee.
   • B. Or if I’m trying to go see birds before the demands of the day hit, I put my boots on. Even when I’d love to sit and have one more cup of coffee in a quiet house. Because just like Charlie Cale, as played magnificently by Natasha Lyonne, I know when it’s time to move on.